Do you suffer from lack of self-confidence? Then you might have some negative mindsets that are affecting how you think about yourself and your self-esteem.
Keep reading to find out what they are and how to deal with them.
We all have fears and negative thoughts about the new experiences and challenges we face, and that’s perfectly normal.
We are simply wired that way.
However, problems arise when you let those fears grow into negative mindsets that control the way you think.
This behavior is really going to start eating up your self-confidence in the long run.
Especially if you are a shy person, this negative thinking can lead to more severe shyness or social anxiety in long term.
So what are negative mindsets?
Negative mindsets have a lot of “always” or “never” talk, this creates a sense of entrapment and feeling hopeless.
Let’s go through some examples of the most common negative mindsets that lead to low self-confidence:
“I will never get it right.”
Thinking this way makes it so easy to give up. It will keep you from trying again or even trying something for the first time.
“Nobody understands what this is like.”
In many cases, you assume that everyone else has it together and you’re the only one there with a problem.
When you lack self-confidence, you may feel isolated as if others have their lives together while you are still struggling.
“I am completely useless.”
When you lack self-confidence, this can make you feel like you don’t have anything of value to contribute. Whether it’s to your relationships, workplace, or something else.
“I am a complete failure.”
You may feel like everything you’ve ever tried has failed, even if this is not true. It’s very rare to fail at every single thing; but to a person with low self-confidence, it can sure seem that way.
“I could never do that.”
How do you react if you see someone with a successful lifestyle you wish you had?
You may have the above reaction when you lack self-confidence.
Instead of being inspired and wanting to create this lifestyle for yourself, you get depressed looking at that person and thinking you could never have what they have.
How can you change these negative mindsets?
To be able to overcome these destructive mindsets that lead to lack of self-confidence, you have to reprogram your thought processes.
To do this, you’ll need to recognize when you are doing the negative self-talk and turn it into something positive in order to start developing self-confidence and feel good about yourself.
Being able to identify the underlying problem will give you a solid foundation to start building a healthy self-esteem.
So how do you do this?
Let’s use a simple example demonstrating how you can stop your negative thinking and put your time and energy towards more constructive thoughts.
So instead of thinking:
“I will never get it right…”
Stop that thought and change it to something more positive like:
“I have trouble with this, but if I keep trying and seek out the right help, I know I can succeed.”
Rather than, “I could never do that,” turn in into “I would love to do that! If I work hard on it, there’s no reason why I can’t have that lifestyle.”
Can you beat lack of self-confidence on your own?
You may need therapy, counseling or a right course and a support group to start overcoming these mindsets.
But in the end, it’s you who will make the change.
Joining a support group where you can meet other people who suffer from low self-esteem can be helpful, and somethings enough to give you that extra push to start taking action.
Further reading and recommended courses
I hope this article gave you a good idea of what is low self-confidence what the underlying issues causing it are.
More more free tips on how to build your confidence, make sure to read our 30 easy techniques to boost your self-confidence.
While you could search the internet for all the articles on low self-confidence and learn everything about it, investing in a course will give you a much more actionable information you can start working on right away.
We’ve listed some of the best online courses available to help you get started on building a healthy self-esteem.
Ultimate Self-Esteem Formula
Dr. Joe Rubino has impacted the lives of more than 2 million people through self-esteem work, personal and group coaching, and personal and leadership development. He’s been featured on the cover of Success Magazine for his ability to impact people’s lives.
He’s put together an online course that lays down his proven formula to improve self-esteem.
Conversation Confidence by Eduard Ezeanu
Eduard Azeanu is a social confidence coach who has over the past 5+ coached individually people from over 20 countries, on 4 continents and helped them turn from anxious and awkward socially to confident and charismatic.
His no-nonsense guide to gaining conversation confidence and making authentic, effortless and captivating conversation comprises over 4 hours of audio content, a PDF handbook and some very cool bonuses.
Shyness and Social Anxiety System by Sean Cooper
If you are suffering shyness or social anxiety, I would highly recommend getting Sean Cooper’s course as it really gets into the root cause of shyness.
The book itself is pretty short and to the point and comes with a ton of practical bonus material to start improving your confidence and social skills.
Check them out and see what works for you. Just make sure you take action!
Like everything else in life, you can do it if you set realistic goals and have confidence in yourself.
Feel free to share your experience and thoughts below in the comments.